“You Can’t Share Raisin Bran” by Nettie Farris

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This summer I’ve been reading The Silver Linings Playbook. Last night, when reading  the scene in which Pat, at the Crystal Lake Diner, shares his Raisin Bran with Tiffany, I burst out crying. Or wanted to. Not the 2nd time they share Raisin Bran, the chapter titled “Sister Sailor Mouth,” but the 1st time, in the chapter, “I can share Raisin Bran.” I couldn’t help but think of that time we had lunch at the Mexican restaurant, and you refused to share your meal with me. Remember? I waited over an hour after the appointed time to even go to lunch, because you were busy, talking to students. And I wasn’t even hungry. I don’t usually eat lunch I’m an ex-dancer with a history of eating disorders and I don’t get hungry until the end of the day. But I wanted to spend some time with you. And when I asked if I could share the meal you ordered, you, very emphatically, said “No.” I don’t remember whether I ordered a meal or not—it’s all a little bit cloudy now, after the no, but I distinctly  remember that you took much of your meal home. What I’m wondering now, is whether you ate those leftovers later, or whether you threw them away and whether or not I should admire the chapter “Sister Sailor Mouth” more, and simply say what I think when I’m thinking it.

-Nettie Farris

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