In his first memoir, Look Me in the Eye, John Elder Robison reveals that, when he doesn’t know what to say, he simply begins with Woof! I’ve thought about using the same gesture myself, but that would be stealing. I think it a much better conversation starter than How Are You?, which isn’t really a conversation starter at all but a pleasantry, said in passing. I don’t even think it very accurate, I mean, people don’t truly want to hear how you are at that moment, and I don’t blame them. It’s really more of a gesture, but a confusing one, for me. Personally, I believe that one should say what one means, and not something else, entirely. For example, when you say, Let’s get together soon, but fail to follow through with your actions, I am confused about what you originally meant by that. Perhaps you truly meant what you said at the time, but changed your mind later. Or perhaps it was merely a social convention, a nicety, something you felt obligated to say, upon leaving. I think it would be much less confusing, in the future, if you would merely say goodbye. I’ll know exactly what you mean by that.

-Nettie Farris