Isn’t it funny to think
I am history happening?

This morning I woke up late
on a couch I paid 900 dollars for
because my ex boyfriend liked the color grey.
I have to say I was impressed and
overjoyed my dog hadn’t shit on the floor
while I was sleeping.
It’s the little things, these days.
 
I haven’t had coffee in weeks because the Keurig
was his and my cheap ass would rather wait for
another boyfriend than spend a hundered dollars
on a cofee machine.  I rushed out the door 
and popped gum in my mouth.  This is how women
of the revolution brush our teeth.  

My name may not be Hillary Rodham Clinton
but I am a woman, dammit, and I respond to tinder
messages from men asking me to buy them dinner
telling them they have to promise to eat me once we’re done.

I wonder how they will describe
the double cheeseburger I ate last night
in text books, and how I let it go straight
to my ass. 

Women make history all the time,
really, what’s the big deal?